I must walk through the gate : an ontological necessity

This research is a self-study into my life as an athlete, elementary school teacher, leamer, and as a teacher educator/academic. Throughout the inquiry, I explore how my beliefs and values infused my lived experiences and ultimately influenced my constructivist, humanist, and ultimately my holistic teaching and learning practice which at times disrupted the status quo. I have written a collection of narratives (data generation) which embodied my identity as an unintelligent student/leamer, a teacher/learner, an experiential learner, a tenacious participant, and a change agent to name a few. As I unpack my stories and hermeneutically reconstruct their intent, I question their meaning as I explore how I can improve my teaching and learning practice and potentially effect positive change when instructing beginning teacher candidates at a Faculty of Education. At the outset I situate my story and provide the necessary political, social, and cultural background information to ground my research. I follow this with an in depth look at the elements that interconnect the theoretical framework of this self-study by presenting the notion of writing at the boundaries through auto ethnography (Ellis, 2000; Ellis & Bochner, 2004) and writing as a method of inquiry (Richardson, 2000). The emergent themes of experiential learning, identity, and embodied knowing surfaced during the data generation phase. I use the Probyn' s (1990) .. metaphor of locatedness to unpack these themes and ponder the question, Where is experience located? I deepen the exploration by layering Drake's (2007) KnowlDo/Be framework alongside locatedness and offer descriptions of learning moments grounded in pedagogical theories. In the final phase, I introduce thirdspace theory (Bhabha, 1994; Soja, 1996) as a space that allowed me to puzzle educational dilemmas and begin to reconcile the binaries that existed in my life both personally, and professionally. I end where I began by revisiting the questions that drove this study. In addition, Ireflect upon the writing process and the challenges that I encountered while immersed in this approach and contemplate the relevance of conducting a self-study. I leave the reader with what is waiting for me on the other side of the gate, for as Henry James suggested, "Experience is never limited, and it is never complete."

Student Perspectives of the Context of Recess; Implications for Student Well-Being

With most students in Canada spending approximately 180 days a year in school, averaging more than six hours a day (Morrison & Kirby, 2011), Wei, Szumilas and Kutcher (2011) argue that this places educational institutions in an unique position in terms of influencing the health and well-being of students. This brings forth the need for school environments to be utilized in ways that are conducive to promoting student development. Much of the educational and developmental components embedded within the school system as well as experiences within greatly influence student’s health and well-being. A national statement was made a concerning American children’s education and mental health that is greatly applicable to the Canadian school system. It was stated that schools “must be active partners in the mental health care of our children” because of the “important interplay between emotional health and school success” (Lazarus & Sulkowski, 2011, pp. 15-16). This identifies the need to ensure that all students, as much as possible, are being provided with safe environments and sufficient support in order to encourage positive developmental trajectories of student health and well-being.

Peer Victimization and the Need to Belong within the Context of Recess

Within the school setting, recess is often reported as a frequent context for bullying (Vaillancourt et al. 2010), but is currently understudied. The present study utilized a mixed-methods approach in order to examine the frequency of peer victimization at recess and explore how the current context of recess relates to children’s sense of belonging. Participants included 464 students between grades 4 to 8 from nine Southern Ontario elementary schools. Self-report measures on peer victimization and belongingness were completed, along with open-ended questions regarding the recess context. Results demonstrated the frequencies of peer victimization at recess, the relationship between victimization and belonging, contextual factors that promote and impede belongingness at recess, and solutions to support children who feel left out.These findings provide further insight for educators and administrators in order to better support children who experience victimization within the recess context.