Becoming most fully ourselves : gender, voice, and ritual in dissertations

The writing and defense of the dissertation serve both as demonstration one is able to do the work of a scholar and as a rite of initiation. In contrast to much academic writing, dissertations generally adhere to narrowly conceived notions of academic discourse. I explore this within the context of an academic community in which under-representation remains a serious issue. This dissertation is about women writing dissertations. I draw from conversations with fifteen women, in or beyond, the process; friends’ anecdotes; published accounts; and, autobiographically, my experience. I suggest the dissertation’s initiatory role is at least as important as its scholarly role; during the process one establishes a sense of self as scholar, writer, and researcher. Students come to the dissertation with some notion of self as writer and scholar – a culturally negotiated sense that is more, or less, congruent with the culturally established self required for successful completion of the dissertation. The degree of congruence (or alternatively, harmony and dissonance) shapes the process of doing a dissertation. I argue that both the community and the language in which dissertations must generally be written are gendered masculine. Negotiating a voice that is acceptable in a dissertation while maintain fidelity to a sense of who one is seems more problematic as one’s distance from the center of dominant culture increases. Believing that agency lies in altering the reiteration of such processes, I worked with my committee to find ways to alter the process yet still do a dissertation I write in a variety of voices – essay and poetry as well as analytical – play with visual qualities of text, and experiment with non-verbal interpretations. These don’t exhaust possibilities, but do give a sense of how the rich variety of expression found in academe cam be brought into the dissertation. I thus demonstrate that one need not reconstitute herself through characteristic academic discourse in order to be initiated into the community of scholars. I suggest both the desirability of encouraging flexibility in the language, form, and process, of dissertations, and the theoretical necessity for such flexibility if the academic community is to become diverse. The writing and defense of the dissertation serve both as demonstration one is able to do the work of a scholar and as a rite of initiation. In contrast to much academic writing, dissertations generally adhere to narrowly conceived notions of academic discourse. I explore this within the context of an academic community in which under-representation remains a serious issue. This dissertation is about women writing dissertations. I draw from conversations with fifteen women, in or beyond, the process; friends’ anecdotes; published accounts; and, autobiographically, my experience. I suggest the dissertation’s initiatory role is at least as important as its scholarly role; during the process one establishes a sense of self as scholar, writer, and researcher Students come to the dissertation with some notion of self as writer and scholar – a culturally negotiated sense that is more, or less, congruent with the culturally established self required for successful completion of the dissertation. The degree of congruence (or alternatively, harmony and dissonance) shapes the process of doing a dissertation. I argue that both the community and the language in which dissertations must generally be written are gendered masculine. Negotiating a voice that is acceptable in a dissertation while maintain fidelity to a sense of who one is seems more problematic as one’s distance from the center of dominant culture increases. Believing that agency lies in altering the reiteration of such processes, I worked with my committee to find ways to alter the process yet still do a dissertation I write in a variety of voices – essay and poetry as well as analytical – play with visual qualities of text, and experiment with non-verbal interpretations. These don’t exhaust possibilities, but do give a sense of how the rich variety of expression found in academe cam be brought into the dissertation. I thus demonstrate that one need not reconstitute herself through characteristic academic discourse in order to be initiated into the community of scholars. I suggest both the desirability of encouraging flexibility in the language, form, and process, of dissertations, and the theoretical necessity for such flexibility if the academic community is to become diverse. The writing and defense of the dissertation serve both as demonstration one is able to do the work of a scholar and as a rite of initiation. In contrast to much academic writing, dissertations generally adhere to narrowly conceived notions of academic discourse. I explore this within the context of an academic community in which under-representation remains a serious issue. This dissertation is about women writing dissertations. I draw from conversations with fifteen women, in or beyond, the process; friends’ anecdotes; published accounts; and, autobiographically, my experience. I suggest the dissertation’s initiatory role is at least as important as its scholarly role; during the process one establishes a sense of self as scholar, writer, and researcher Students come to the dissertation with some notion of self as writer and scholar – a culturally negotiated sense that is more, or less, congruent with the culturally established self required for successful completion of the dissertation. The degree of congruence (or alternatively, harmony and dissonance) shapes the process of doing a dissertation. I argue that both the community and the language in which dissertations must generally be written are gendered masculine. Negotiating a voice that is acceptable in a dissertation while maintain fidelity to a sense of who one is seems more problematic as one’s distance from the center of dominant culture increases. Believing that agency lies in altering the reiteration of such processes, I worked with my committee to find ways to alter the process yet still do a dissertation I write in a variety of voices – essay and poetry as well as analytical – play with visual qualities of text, and experiment with non-verbal interpretations. These don’t exhaust possibilities, but do give a sense of how the rich variety of expression found in academe cam be brought into the dissertation. I thus demonstrate that one need not reconstitute herself through characteristic academic discourse in order to be initiated into the community of scholars. I suggest both the desirability of encouraging flexibility in the language, form, and process, of dissertations, and the theoretical necessity for such flexibility if the academic community is to become diverse. The writing and defense of the dissertation serve both as demonstration one is able to do the work of a scholar and as a rite of initiation. In contrast to much academic writing, dissertations generally adhere to narrowly conceived notions of academic discourse. I explore this within the context of an academic community in which under-representation remains a serious issue. This dissertation is about women writing dissertations. I draw from conversations with fifteen women, in or beyond, the process; friends’ anecdotes; published accounts; and, autobiographically, my experience. I suggest the dissertation’s initiatory role is at least as important as its scholarly role; during the process one establishes a sense of self as scholar, writer, and researcher Students come to the dissertation with some notion of self as writer and scholar – a culturally negotiated sense that is more, or less, congruent with the culturally established self required for successful completion of the dissertation. The degree of congruence (or alternatively, harmony and dissonance) shapes the process of doing a dissertation. I argue that both the community and the language in which dissertations must generally be written are gendered masculine. Negotiating a voice that is acceptable in a dissertation while maintain fidelity to a sense of who one is seems more problematic as one’s distance from the center of dominant culture increases. Believing that agency lies in altering the reiteration of such processes, I worked with my committee to find ways to alter the process yet still do a dissertation I write in a variety of voices – essay and poetry as well as analytical – play with visual qualities of text, and experiment with non-verbal interpretations. These don’t exhaust possibilities, but do give a sense of how the rich variety of expression found in academe cam be brought into the dissertation. I thus demonstrate that one need not reconstitute herself through characteristic academic discourse in order to be initiated into the community of scholars. I suggest both the desirability of encouraging flexibility in the language, form, and process, of dissertations, and the theoretical necessity for such flexibility if the academic community is to become diverse.