Not accepted by the family: "Being difficult" or "being different"?

Using data from the Netherlands Kinship Panel Study (NKPS) and combining a quantitative approach and a qualitative approach (N = 8,148 and n = 43, respectively), this study investigates the mechanisms associated with a lack of acceptance by one's family. From the total NKPS sample, 12.1% did not feel (entirely) accepted by their family. The authors hypothesized that people may not feel accepted by their family when they are "difficult," for example, by exhibiting personal problems; another reason might be that they are "different," for instance, because they have made nontraditional life course transitions or differ from their parents in educational level or religious preference. Both quantitative and qualitative results confirm the first hypothesis rather than the second. Qualitative results revealed a gender difference in the mechanisms associated with a lack of acceptance by one's family as well as differences in the resilience of those who had had a difficult family background.